Art Community Courtesy

I think I've lost my art community courtesy and overall awareness. I remember the days when there was a genuine exchange between myself and any other artist I connected with. However, lately it's been brought to my awareness that I've possibly been, not rude, but neglecting my courteous exchange. I do not look at this act as an obligation instead it's a true pleasure. I am so sorry to those I have not been able to continue communication with or the overall exchange of my thoughts and reactions in the world of art. I will get to the focus point soon of being able to stay grounded, but in touch too. Love all my artists and their love they've given! xoxoxoxo

Glance to Glance CHANCE

Just found this piece of writing that I wrote sometime between 2008 & 2009....

Bloody Crusted Lips
Scab Scratched Face
Blue Eyed Boy
Glance to Glance
     CHANCE

Train Romance "the original"
Scull buckle and all
One Such as Would
        FALL

Starring back
Bukowski at my feet
Camera on my mind
Your kiss Would be a treat

Luck is no matter here
My Decision
True Love awaits
You and With
No Collision

Poking, prawding, and pushing me into the Anger Stage

I have been grieving slowly and in my own way. Tonight I've been pushed to the limit. Everyday day for the last fucking two weeks I have had the unfortunate experience of going through people's emotions instead of facing and dealing with my own. Only one person has been honest and seems to understand the art of communication and I thank her for that. There is however and unfortunate number of people that can not just keep peace by keeping quiet. Maybe I haven't come forward with what I need during my time of need, but I haven't known until now. Originally I was upset at the limited amount of people that actually had the nerve to check up on me, but now I just want everyone to leave me alone until I come to them. This is a very powerful thing/statement, and I understand that, but if all I am doing by ignoring you or putting you off is hurting your feelings then I'd like to deal with that later down the line if it's okay with you. How can anyone be so self involved as to come at someone during the worst emotional time in there life and judge or beg for a certain level of attention. I can't believe that Facebook, twitter, cell phones, and text messages aren't enough for people, what other form of confirmation that people care, or "care", do you need. Let people in suffering rest up. Let them breathe. Don't hold expectations of when you "think" they should heal. I personally don't need to hear anymore stories alike, I don't need words of wisdom, I don't need anyone in my face about my feelings or theirs.

I am angry. It's official, I can't see certain people now. I have reached a limit of calm and content. I have no more warnings to give or favors to ask. I am on the rough road of finding peace, happiness, or any combination of those things that might allow me to live on a some what normal level.

God forbid that anyone, or any of you, loose someone. There's been death and loss forever, but each person struggles or deals with it in their own way. I've been blessed with some fortunate conversations, but I ask for no more. I feel like I'm choking on pudding or drowning in a see of words.

I had a friend that mentioned once that they were sick of people feeding off of their tragedy and at the time I didn't get it. Now I feel like I understand it fully. Every time you make this about you or someone else you take away dignity from yourself and the unfortunate situation.

I'll be in the bar in two weeks with whiskey in hand if anyone dares to discuss anything further on the matter.

Dearest Readers....this is my loss to suffer, please let me do it in my own space and time.

The Coffee Kid

They call me "The Coffee Kid". I wake up with a grumpy grin, or a satin stare. You don't want to try to talk at me until my second cup. I'll be your best friend if you just give me my wake up tradition. After the second cup my thoughts start to warm up...

... i took the best of them both and made a body & soul dedicated to the idea...

...where's my best friend today...

... this day is going to be good, but I have a lot of packing to do ...

... and everything keeps moving forward.